lump

i want to be a lump. not any kind of lump in particular, just a lump. i’m tired of all the emotions that runs thru this weak body. not looking for sympathy, just empathy. it’s one of those days where everything is so damn annoying…even yourself especially yourself. tire of thinking, of feeling, of believing, of being wrong. cuz honestly…that’s what i am. the guy to my left is smarter than me (smart is not a referance to IQ, tho he probably has one higher than me too. smart is the relation between you and your ability to be happy, and in that sense, he’s…)way smarter than me. he’s reading a book, looks like he’s enjoying himself too. and later he’s probably gonna go home and contemplate all the new cool stuff he’d learned. i want to be that guy. but ofcourse…im tired of learning. why bother…what i thought/think was/is true will be false and i have to learn something else over. just like this damn blog. as i finish i will realize how i stupid i am/sound and how wrong everything i just typed is/was(?).