Archive for the ‘remember’ Category

work out

July 1, 2008

Ballys has a free guest pass for 14 days, 24hr Fitness for 7 (you are lame 24 hr Fitness).  i have decided to make resolution (for this month) and start working out.  i’ll be trying to ride my bike (and metro) at least once a week, and will go to the gym twice a week and my meals will be kept in checked my by beloved girlfriend (whoot to weight watchers).  want me some abs and buff guns.

a few things

June 19, 2008

This is along overdue but, R.I.P. Tim Russert.  You will be miss

I miss traveling; even though they have not all been wonderful, some can’t even be consider remotely good.

Kobe is not Jordan.  I’m tired of comparison.  And though i’m just adding to the gluttony of the conversation, I still just want to make this clear.  The reason Jordan is Jordan, is also the reason why NO ONE will/can/should be consider as Jordan.  Kobe is Kobe.  Just like Magic is Magic.  Like Doctor J is Doctor J.  Lebron is Lebron.

And on the same note…the only reason people want to kick this dead horse is because the era of jordan and kobe was in our lifetime.  Imagine if Jack Nicklaus and Tiger were within a decade of each other.  Look at Federer and Sampras.  Think of Payton and Brady.  People will always compare, but when they do, they marginalize the achievement of the other.

i need to come up with a new design for my site.  no more cutesy kitsch graphic.  i want to go with something bold, abby, shinny.

tears for the lakers lost.  applauses to Rayray, KG, and Pirce, you guys deserve it.

i should watch “He Got Game” again.  Totally forgot what happens.

it’s late

Free Education

May 15, 2008

education should be free (even colleges, universities, and some trade schools).

lets consider this simply fact; public schools k-12 is free (paid for my our taxes).  Of course, they’re not the greatest of institutions, nonetheless, it does help society and the general public become, by all intents purposes, better.  show me one person that disagrees with this fact and i will show you an idiot with no commonsense.

However, in the past a high school education was enough.  After achieving it, one can go into the work force, maintain a career, have a family, and retired with grace.  But what’s most important about getting a high school diploma then; is the knowledge you obtain to make you a better, more inform, social conscience person.

In those time, colleges and universities were considered “higher learning”.  they were places that didn’t settle with sufficiency, but places to be enlighten at.  These were institution where you find who you are and struggler to gain as much knowledge as you can.  However, those days have past, at least in the under graduate sense.  Speaking as a person that finished his under grad and is pondering the idea of graduate school, i know exactly what that means.

maybe its the generational gap, maybe it’s the decline of public education, maybe it’s the unrealistic sense of the world, but whatever’s the case, high school just doesn’t cut it anymore.  And in turn, undergraduate education isn’t what it use to be.

so here’s my proposal, make community colleges free, subsidize public state universities, and federally fund trades schools (specifically nursing and other medical care related field where we have a shortage of).  With this new principle, we will built a more intelligent society as a whole, and hopefully a more safe and profitable one.  The cost for this however will not be small.  It will take a lot of work, and a lot of money to implement.  But if one can quantify the gains we will achieve from it in the long run, i believe it’s worth it.

points

May 2, 2008

ok haven’t wrote here in awhile. been busy with a couple of stuff at work, building my site, and just plain being lazy. so with that i give u my rant…

Myli Cyrus (i dont know how to spell her name and i dont care about her enough to look it up). I give her credit to disney. they have long been able to get young kids and their parents to spend stupid amounts of money on really useless, really unoriginal, really annoying things. they package it in a way that makes it fun, colorful, and most of all wholesome. Even with the scandal with that nude girl from High School Musical, the pregnant young Spares, and recently the image in Vanity Fair of a [again] nude Myli, it all still wont faze disney one bit. You may ask how can this happen…will thats simple. because when it’s all said and done, the notion of kids will be kid/people will do what they want to do stills holds up. in a week or two time people will write it off as “just one of those things” and disney will be on the move again. Looking to build any immature franchise.

the war in iraq sucks. i mean, ok, taking out Sadam, good. he was pretty evil and i didnt like him anyways. but now what do we have? we got al-qaeda in iraq, which wasnt there in the first place. we got Moqtada Al-Sadr and his militia, who i dont necessary agree with but can understand. we got bin-laden there in Pakistan, which we’re not going near. we got afghanistan and for what? hell if i know. we not putting enough money in there to do anything! and al-qaeda is now world wide. they have no central organization or head. we need to think smarter, more flexible, and SMARTER!

**side note**imaging our country was being invaded by another (not attacked, invaded!) They siege control of our government and started killing/imprison anyone who would stand up against them. in fact, just the suspicion of you being one of these people will warrant them to detain and imprison you. what do you do? do you oblige quietly and listen to these invaders? do you raise your hand and question the establishment? do you join a militia and retake what is your’s? is this when we finally see the importance of the 2nd amendment? is this when we finally know what it’s like to be weak but having to fight? now ok you can relax. it’s not us. but it is the iraqis. this war we made ourselves. now we’re trying to fix it. first with force, then with money. now we just dont know what to do. it’s sad really. though i criticize, point out the flaws, i still have no answer. this is a lot more complicating than any one person can comprehend. but that’s that point isn’t it. we all need to stop trying to fix a problem we dont even understand yet…because you know what, we might just fuck it up even more.

why the fuck is weed illegal? here are the facts: 1) weed harms your body just as much as cigarettes and alcohol and as addictive. 2) the notion that weed is a gateway drug is as idiotic as thinking that going to a recreational shotting range will lead to you trying to blow up a public building. 3) medical marijuana can be a godsend to people fighting arthritis, glaucoma, depression, and insomnia. 4) shit its legal in Amsterdam. 5) the money we would make from the legalization of it (tax revenue, jobs creation) would not only take away from the gangs and dug dealers, but would better support our nation.

i get confuse by barack. sometimes he seems like a confident man with a strong sense of who he is and what he believes in. other times, he contorts to what people what to him to say and how is should act. I dont like this “High road” campaign thing hes going for. Stop trying to be nice and (as some may say) be real! Dont defend what you said, elaborate on it (like he did with the speech on race issues in america). push back if need be. call that bitch out. how is her being a conic liar not hurting her as much as some guy u know making inflammatory remarks damaging you? i dont care even if he was your spiritual adviser…how the fuck does that matter? you denounced him in public already ok, but what i suggest was that you tell people what this man was and how you guys are friends/were friends. and like all friends you guys have disagreements. he keeps you grounded. listening to him make you realize who you are. and like all intelligent people, you can differentiate between what rhetoric is and what conversation is.

**another side note**Hilary, shut the fuck up. you lost. that’s rite…lost! not losing, but lost. dont bust a George Bush and lose the popular vote and try to win via [super]delegate votes. You know that’s what you’re doing rite?

Iron Man rocks! it’s one of those movie that makes you remember why you love movies so much. visual candy…yes. light hearted humor…on point. meta message…yup it’s there. it was a perfect summer movie, and since it’s the first one, lets hope it’s not setting the bar too high. go see it!

and im done….for now

It’s becoming evident that i…am still very young.

March 28, 2008

do not get me wrong. i am neither immature nor juvenile. though i am only 24, i am also not talking about my age. What i do mean however, is that the idea of youth as it is associate with the obsession for figuring out who one is and how one can change the the world. And by this very point, i must, and can only call myself, young.

i read the news everyday and place myself in the situations of the subject. i ask myself, “how would i have acted? who was in the the right, the wrong?” i believe I’m a relatively smart, well-round, moral individual with a great commonsense, who can solve any problem, or at the very least, have the most intelligent point to make to the conversation. and this…is the down side of my youth, the part that i’m slowing trying to train.

Less stubbornness, more flexibility. less preaching, more conversation.

please someone explain to me how…

March 17, 2008

1) CEO’s of supposedly troubled companies in troubled industries still manage to net ridiculous sums of money. we are talking about hundreds of millions of dollars to one man when apparently the company is in billions of dollars of debt. people are losing jobs, the economy is suffocating, and yet it’s never ending.

2) Bush and Chaney have not been impeach yet? no need for explanations here.

3) I’m still waiting on that check from BDI, Ryan, and the government? i need some money!

4) I manage to snag up the prettiest most awesomely funny and cool chick in the world? cause between u and me…i dont deserve her.

5) though people are relatively smart (least the ones i’m around), how can it be that cumulatively, we’r all so stupid?

bring it!

March 7, 2008

So i was watching “Real World/Road Rules: The Gauntlet” last night and before you start to make fun of me, know that i only do this for research purposes only. I am fascinated at the concept of gathering hot bod, short fuse, emotionally handicap 20-somethings together and give them free alcohol and minimal supervision. Then they must compete in moronic challenges where in the end of it all, they give out a ridiculous sum of money. Now i’m not here to judge the morality of all this, or even to criticize the corporations that are involve. I’m simply curious about one small information: “Is there a on-site therapist?”

If any of you have ever watched the show (or any others of the likes), you will notice that there are always some sort of a “confessional room” and on-site medics. But there never seem to be any therapist, psychiatric, or a priest anywhere around! i understand that these shows are all about escalating the drama, and from that standpoint, having the mentioned would not be good for business. but shouldn’t something be said about if a person ask for help, they should receive it?

Imagine a documentary about crack addicts, wait better yet, plain ol’ alcoholics. now for the film maker, it’s best for them to see and study the behaviors of their subjects. to observe how their mental and physical bodies begin to decline and it’s effects of the people around them. If a subject chooses to get clean, the film maker follows that process as well. They see if they can succeed and comment on their ordeal. The parallels between this and MTV’s The Gauntlet is the notion of the “Observer”. Someone that watches, comments on, but does not touch. this principle is fine by me. there can be a million shows like that and it would not bother me. What does yank my chains is that if a subject ASK for help, looks like they need it and wants it, then its the obligation of the observer to do something about it.  It seem like the majority of these kids need this help, and it doesn’t seem like MTV is gonna do anything about it.  Since the show is obviously edited maybe they do provide the necessary services, but somehow i doubt it.  but since i dont know, i’ll leave it at that.

All i hope is that they do have someone around that can help these kids once/if they’re ready for it.

6 words

March 3, 2008

how to, one day, i will

http://www.newyorker.com/talk/2008/02/25/080225ta_talk_widdicombe

Feb is a bad month

February 21, 2008

About 6 years ago i went to a local mall and got my cartilage pierced. It was a quick procedure, done with a small gun and cost about $15. However, i did not pay that. After the girl that plunged a hold in my ear told me that i was done and i can get off the stool, I remember walking faintly to the register. I did not make it. I felt my brain trying to escape my skull and i had to catch it before it does so. i turned around and stumbled to exit the store.

After this, it was all pretty black.

i don’t remember actually leaving the shop. i don’t remember blacking out. I didn’t feel a thing when i hit the tile floor or cranked my head and nose on the wall, or how i managed to sit up. All i remembered was a bright white flash that ran across by face, then a pool of blood that surrounded me. I don’t know how long i was out for or how long i’ve been sitting there. By the time i was up, my friend Nino was right next to me. He was getting his ear pierced too and was behind me the entire time. He saw me get pierced, attempted to make it to the register, and exited the store. He however, did not realized what was happening, and by the time he did…it was too late. To his defense, i didnt either. i dont blame him for anything. The only person i do blame, is myself.

Sitting on that hard floor all i did was get mad. get mad and spat blood. I didn’t care for the people that were walking by me, shocked at all the gore that was on the floor. All i did was shook my head, spat out more blood. It must of been at least 30 minuted before the paramedics came and hauled me off in stretcher. it was kinda interesting…i went through the secret back way of the mall (thru Macy), through an secret elevator, and rode on an ambulance. I think by now the pain was starting to hit, and definitely the shock. The whole time i was at the hospital was a dreadful blur.

I remember being in the ER, still upset at my predicament. I remember getting Novocaine injections, i hated them. The sound of those long sharp needles ripping through my skin makes me cringe. But what i hated more was that fact that i can no longer recognized my face. My bottom jaw had split in two and had been complete dislocated from its joints. My teeth, top and bottom, were smashed. They jutted every which way and cranked all over. Lastly, i also broke my nose and forehead. I think it took a couple of days to prep for my surgery. at that time, the only thing i remember doing was waiting. Waiting for all of it to be over.

Finally the day of my surgery. The method they make you do of counting backwards from ten was great. When i woke up it was finished. I started to get carted away when a cold chill hit me. I shook so hard i was about to fall off the gurney. The nurses began to surround me with pillows and blankets but that did little. i wanted to scream and cry so loud but i couldn’t. My head was warp up in bandages, preventing the stitches to rip open, and my jaw was wired shut. all i could do was make a low moaning sound to relieve this tension that wont let go of my body. i passed out again. It was about 2 months before i would come to.

At this time, i was able to out in public. The swelling had subside and i began to look normal again. Bare in mind i still had wires clamped shut on my jaws and i weighed a strapping 90lbs, i still looked ok. I was tired laying around at home annoyed at every other commercials and tv programs that come up showing food and people having fun. i was ready to go back to school again, see my friends, and enjoy a bit of life i use to had. Sure it was hard trying to talked to people, the actual mechanics of my talking was impossible of course, but on top of that, having to explain to everyone why i was in this situation. Concerts and hanging out at a restaurants was out of the questions, but who cared, i was at least moving around. I can be happy for that alone. It took a couple more months for me to open my month again, and few more to start eating solid foods. but i guess like any injuries, my jaw and teeth was never the same.

fast forward 3 years. I’m living a pretty normal life, doing everything i would be pretty much doing if i didn’t have that accident. Yeah i get paranoid when i fall sometimes, thinking that i might shatter my jaw again, and hear clicking with i chew. I still get pain from simple activities like talking and still cant bite into a crispy apple. but it’s ok. i can over look those things. But one morning, i woke up with pain around my left nostril. I noticed a slight swelling but dismissed it for a bug bite or something random. This continued for a few days and i was starting to lose feeling to the left side of my face. I began to get nauseous and weak and knew now that it was something more serious. I started doing research on my symptoms and found that it was probably due to a tooth abscess. What sold me on it was the line “Teeth Abscess may be cause by an infection of a damage tooth due to trauma”. the injuries i sustained when i broke my jaw lead me to another medical ordeal. I immediately saw a dentist who suggested i get a root canal and crown. since that day, i had a fake tooth. Most people dont notice it, but i do, but that was ok.

Now i wish the story would end there, and until a few day ago, it did. Recently, i started to notice pain and swelling coming from relatively the same area as the earlier incident. Knowing rite away that this was an abscess i went to see a dentist. I was hoping that all that was require would be drainage of the pus, and i would be ok. i was wrong. this diagnosis was much worst. The root canal that i earlier did to clear the abscess and save the tooth, failed. The infection escaped and ate away at my bone. It’s now trying to attack another tooth. I need to get an extraction, and a bridge. It seems this constant cycle of wars between me, my ego, my health, the fates, the germs, will never end. i’m so tired. i hate having to be afraid for my future. it’s already unsure as it is. i hope this is the last of this issue. but somehow, i feel that it will not be.

some day

February 7, 2008

sometimes it’s so easy being a cynic. i sit at my computer, detach from the actual world and spend my day thinking about how it can be better, how i can make it better. Yet, i haven’t done any good. sure i’m smart, cautions, i care about littering and manage my consumption. I think about my actions and how it mite affect other, and in all honesty, i’ve played the nice/caring/environmentalist/socialist/libertarian guy part just fine. but that is little to nothing. i want to be saving the world. i can be making my voice heard. but i dont. i sit at my computer, and write this post. a post no one would ever read (love u). my ambition is existential.

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